urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover Thomas Harrington Thomas Harrington 2008-08-27T11:18:09Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:4680 2008-08-27T11:18:09Z 2008-08-27T11:18:09Z Vast - "Somehwere Else To Be" ...bury me with copies of the following albums...<br /><br /><i>Tool - "Lateralus"<br />Meshuggah - "Obzen"<br />Megadeth - "Rust In Peace"<br />Metallica - "...And Justice For All"<br />Soundgarden - "Superunknown"<br />Alice In Chains - "Dirt"</i> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:4415 2007-10-02T13:25:41Z 2007-10-02T13:25:41Z Chevelle - "Wonder What's Next" (2002) <font face="Arial">...and I'm up at this weird hour so I might as well use the time to update everyone on what I'm up to these days.<br><br>Actually it's been an odd flip-flop of vacationing and rushing tasks along over the last few months. Like a stop-and-go of relaxation and responsibilities. It's been doing a number on my sanity, so I've mostly been trying to keep a grip on that.<br><br>Caitlin and I have traveled to North Carolina, Southern California, and Arizona over this Summer (not to mention a fun little trip to Vegas where I played too much Black Jack but enjoyed many free drinks). Between trips we've been getting her prepared to start studying @ Mills College in Oakland, CA this Winter.<br><br>I've been spending much of my time with <a href="http://www.blacksnakemoan.com"><i><b>Black Snake Moan</b></i></a> helping them recover from a split with their guitarist and working with them towards getting back to gigging up and down Northern California. I've been having a lot of fun with them, though for the time being, I'm essentially a hired gun. We'll see how all that works out.<br><br>I'm currently in the process of cramming through the <i>California Drivers Handbook</i> in preperation for drivers training this month. I'm not really looking forward to going through the motions (though, I'm sure I'll enjoy driving when I get used to it). Mostly, it's pressure because it has to get done before November. I'll need to have a vehicle available for traveling to gigs and getting from place to place once we've moved closer to Mills College. The drivers here in the Bay Area don't make me any more enthusiastic about getting on the road.<br><br>...here's to hoping that everything works out as it should.</font> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:4348 2007-02-17T03:18:22Z 2007-02-17T03:18:22Z <font face="Arial">...and I miss him dearly.</font> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:4047 2007-01-27T01:15:58Z 2007-01-27T01:15:58Z The good news: 2007 can only get better from here. The bad news: January has been possibly the most unpleasant month in my recent history.<br /><br />It all started on Christmas Day actually, I noticed that my eye was bothering me. After four or five days of my eye gradually getting worse, I went to the doctor to have it checked out. They diagnosed me with pink eye and gave me a perscription of anti-biodic eye drops. As it turns out, I was diagnosed incorrectly and given a perscription that was twice the dosage I was supposed to be taking. I didn't find this out until an actual Optimologist visit one week after the new year. This time, the doctor told me that the reason my eye had continued to get worse was because there was, in fact, a speck of metal embedded in my eye (which they then removed) and that the overdosage of antibodies in my eye was irritating it further. Too bad I can't get my money back for the first doctor's innacuracy. Thankfully, that's all over with, as it was severe pain that was turning me into a very unpleasant person to be around.<br /><br />Not long after I had escaped my eye troubles, I caught a winter bug. No surprise, as everyone seems to be getting sick this season. However, this cold (or whatever the hell it is) is severe enough that I had to convince myself not to smoke or drink until it's done with. This may not seem all that severe to some folks, but to put it in perspective... I have been completely and utterly sober for five days now. Before this, I had not had a completely and utterly sober full day since well before I was 18 years old. I only quit smoking marijuana about five months ago, and I am a daily cigarette smoker and alchohol consumer. Clearly, this is actually a good thing, but it's more than a little bit aggravating and very difficult to keep up. I'd also like to see this cold disolve a bit more quickly. I've had it for seven days now and it's only hinting at letting up.<br /><br />I can handle all of this, but what I'm having the most difficulty handling is the fact that all month long, my love, my world, my everything... Caitlin, has been on a downward slope of depression that shows absolutely no sign of letting up. There's nothing that I can seem to do about it, there doesn't seem to be anything that anyone else can do about it, and it's hard to see any self-modivation from her to do anything about it. I am, in essence, watching her slowly die inside, and I'm helpless to stop it. This in turn, rips my heart in half. I can't put it any more plainly than that. When she's unhappy, I'm miserable.<br /><br />...may February be one thousand times more bearable than its predecessor. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:3832 2007-01-10T04:24:15Z 2007-01-10T04:24:15Z Whatever Caitlin is listening to at the moment... ...doin' this one for my Lovely Lunai...<br /><br />1. Greenbacks (Yes! Money!)<br />2. Garbage Disposal (...that thing's a God-send)<br />3. Gittyness (uncontrollable laughter is good for the soul...)<br />4. Ganja (...though I haven't had any in over four months now...)<br />5. Golden State Warriors (That's my team, baby!)<br />6. Games of Berkeley (...I do enjoy my work...)<br />7. General History (I'm a dork.)<br />8. Garlic Salt (...essential for good pasta...)<br />9. Gumbo (I like soup.)<br />10. Gordo's (...best burritos in Berkeley)<br /><br />...I got a little hungry towards the end of this list, as you can tell. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:3572 2006-12-01T21:50:43Z 2006-12-01T21:50:43Z Imogen Heap - "Only Got One" <font face="Arial">...lounging in my home, with my girlfriend, on a Friday afternoon, with the sun shining through the windows, my lady's gentle music in the background, a basketball game on the television, and a Summer Martini in my hand... simple pleasures... truly, this is Heaven.</font> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:3083 2006-09-24T07:36:06Z 2006-09-24T07:36:06Z Is it wrong that I have the urge to go back to the store right now and get some extra work done? When did I walk over that bridge that seperates wanting to run away from work and wanting to pour myself into it? I'm becoming a workaholic so suddenly... I hope it will benefit me more than it might shut me out of my own life. Still, it feels good to have a sense of value and self worth, even if it's not how I'd planned it. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:2884 2006-09-16T02:54:07Z 2006-09-16T02:56:43Z I am actually watching a special on the evolution of the toilet!<br /><br />...I decided to use this day and relax, even to the point of wasted hours. Yes, I am doing nothing and I am rather enjoying it. <br /><br />The oppurtunity rarely presents itself anymore, and although I've gotten past the point of depending on such nothingness, it's nice to endulge every now and then. I figure I should take advantage while I can. I'm starting another workshop at <i>Blue Bear</i> in a week and work at <i>Games of Berkeley</i> continues to be a full-time, energy-consuming task that challenges me more all the time. Sometimes I wish that more of my fellow employees took their jobs as seriously as I do, but I've gotten used to some people taking advantage of how lucky they are and not giving much back... it never ceases to frusterate me though. I miss Gabe... I miss Maggie... Gabe in particular will probably never know how much he influenced my work ethic, but I am very greatful to have shared a workplace with him.<br /><br />As for the new workshop, I'll keep everyone posted on when we'll be playing. So far, I'm liking some of the song suggestions that the other folks are throwing in, but every one of these workshops generally has musicians that are going in a completely different direction than I am. Still, the workshops are always fun, and I turn into someone else when I'm on stage. If you're comin' to the shows, you'll understand...<br /><br />...anyway, I've got to get back to the <i>History Channel</i>... they've moved on to the toothbrush, and I think I just heard someone mention washing one's mouth out with urine?! What the hell?! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:2563 2006-07-17T19:42:46Z 2006-07-17T19:42:46Z Muse - "Assassins" The last time I saw her was Friday evening as the bus she was on pulled away from my corner and we waived goodbye to each other. All weekend she's been busy, and so we haven't gotten the chance to spend time together. It's difficult enough to go an entire day without holding her and exchanging our usual nothings and goofiness... let alone two days without her. And so, I miss her very dearly... but we're having dinner together tonight. I can't wait... urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:2542 2006-06-26T04:51:39Z 2006-06-26T04:52:47Z Stevie Wonder - "Contusion" It's nearly 10:00pm, I'm sitting here at <i>GOB</i>, even though we closed at 7:00pm and my shift ended at 7:30pm. I'm all by myself here at the store for the first time and it's an eerie feeling. I can say, at least, that this was the best closing shift I've ever had. I worked my ass off for most of the day, got some of the closing duties out of the way early, and at the end of the night, the register balanced perfectly. It all went through without a hitch, things got done so smoothly that I actually clocked out early. So it's progressed from finishing an hour late on my first closing shift *ugh*, to actually finishing early. I do hope this happens more often.<br /><br />As for right now, I'm tired and Caitlin doesn't get off work until 11:30pm, so the store is currently my comfortable haven. So, here I sit, listening to music, surfing the web, counting the minutes until I should lock up the store and head on over to pick up Caitlin.<br /><br />...not my usual LJ post, I know... urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:2301 2006-06-13T05:55:23Z 2006-06-13T05:55:23Z Tool - "Jambi" [Here from the / If in the / Infinite] king's mountain view<br />[Here from / If in] the wild dream come true<br />Feast like a sultan, I do<br />On treasures and flesh never few<br /><br /><br />But I would wish it all, away<br />If I thought I'd lose you just one day<br /><br /><br />The devil and his had me down<br />In love with the dark side I've found<br />Dabblin' all the way down<br />Up to my neck soon to drown.<br /><br />But you changed that all for me<br />Lifted me up, turned me round<br /><br /><br />So I, I would wish this all away<br /><br /><br />Pray like a [martyr / father] dusk to dawn<br />Beg like a hooker all night long<br />Shout to the devil with my song<br />And got what I wanted all along<br /><br /><br />But I<br />I would<br />If I could<br />I would<br />Wish it away<br />Wish it away<br />Wish it all away<br />Wanna wish it all away<br />No [pressure could / ? ] hold sway<br />[Or justify my / [On / Hold] just a fine line]<br />[Giving / Kneeling] away, my [sinner / center]<br /><br /><br />So if I could I'd wish it all away<br />If I thought tomorrow, they'd take you away<br /><br /><br />You're my piece of mind,<br />[my own / my all]<br />I said I'm just trying to hold on<br />One more day<br /><br /><br />Damn my eyes! <br /><br />Damn my eyes!<br />If they should compromise<br />A fulcrum<br />[Want and need; if I need,<br />/ What you need, if I leave,<br />/ Watching me divide me]<br />Then I might as well be gone...<br /><br /><br />Shine on forever<br />Shine on benevolent sun<br />Shine down upon the broken<br />Shine [on 'til / until] the two become one<br /><br /><br />Shine on forever<br />Shine on benevolent sun<br />Shine down upon the severed<br />Shine [on 'til / until] the two become one<br /><br /><br />[Divide and wither away<br />/ Divided, withering away<br />/ Divide, I'm withering away<br />/ Divide, I wither away]<br /><br /><br />Shine down upon the many, light our way,<br />Benevolent sun.<br /><br /><br />Breathe in union<br /><br />So, as one, survive<br />Another day and season<br />[Silent legions / Silently, just] save your poison<br />[Silent legions / Silently, just] stay out of my way urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:1860 2006-06-05T04:46:01Z 2006-06-05T04:46:01Z Tonight, I was given my biggest assignment at <i>GOB</i> to date. It was under my authority to close the store, and it couldn't have gone much worse than it did. I freaked out from the beginning because I was so nervous that I couldn't even figure out how to lock the front door. Once that was taken care of, my jitters effected my speed in counting out the cash register. It didn't help, though, that the register had a few technical errors and that practically every final count was over what it was supposed to be (Cash, Credit, Debit, etc.). Finally, I finished counting the drawer, did my final closing preperations, and headed to the office to start the data backup... except I hadn't reconsiled the register I had just counted out. I figured that it could be done in the morning and that I would leave that for Tanya because the register was so off that I knew she'd want to double-check it. Anyway, I was supposed to reconsile it anyway, and I didn't, and I was lucky that it didn't cause the data backup to fail. All in all, my first closing shift was a disaster, and I hope it goes much better next time (if there is a next time). urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:1658 2006-05-05T09:05:28Z 2006-05-05T09:05:28Z Skunk Anansie - "It Takes Blood and Guts to Be" It seems I have forgotten myself a bit. I've been so absorbed in the newest pieces of my life (Caitlin, the love of my life -- Moving in with the love of my life -- Securing financial stability at my job) that I've begun to neglect that which was most important to me in the first place... music!<br /><br />My neglection has been in my sub-conscious, cloaked by the fact that I've been studying at <b>Blue Bear</b> (which is so generous and influential to me) for almost a year straight... but I never really payed attention to the fact that I hadn't been pursuing my own musical exploration during that period. I used to dedicate countless hours to my craft, and it brought me to a very comfortable, seemingly acomplished point in my musical life. At some point, recently, I stopped paying attention to it (probably feeling more comfortable with where I was at than I should have been) and began focusing any and all of my time towards the newest aspects of my life.<br /><br />Everything that is new is critical and vital to who I have become... but I can't let myself drift from my music, which keeps me sane, happy and creative. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:1374 2006-05-02T08:53:59Z 2006-05-02T08:54:29Z Tool - "10,000 Days" I should not be awake right now, and while I have a good reason to be up (you may disagree), I will definitely be tired in the morning. My reason for being awake is this: I have just downloaded a copy of Tool's new album "10,000 Days" which has only been out for a few hours here in the states. Keep in mind, this is the album that I have been waiting patiently and painfully for... for five years now. It is truely a masterpiece. I was slightly hesitant to listen to it... only because I was told by a friend of mine earlier today that Tool was "due for a bad album" and so he expected this would be Tool's first disapointment. <b><i>NO CHANCE!</i></b>...<br /><br />The music on this record is absolutely amazing and I'll be up listening to it for hours... urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:1073 2006-04-20T01:11:22Z 2006-04-20T01:11:22Z ...first it was going to be the first week of May, but now it looks like Caitlin and I won't be moving until August. We're giving up on looking for places, and we've settled on the idea of moving into the apartment her mom lives in... once her mom finds the next place that she wants. Sometimes I wish we had just jumped on the idea of taking over Gabe and Jenny's lease.<br /><br />Still, I am so excited about us moving in together. I'm a little worried about expenses though. Last night I dropped $250 at <b>Costco</b> on items we'll be needing for our new home... <i>I barely scratched the list that Caitlin and I have made</i>. It'll turn out being way more expensive gathering what we need then it will be to move it all in. We'll survive though, and we'll be so happy when it's all over and done with. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:827 2006-03-30T02:39:34Z 2006-03-30T02:41:33Z <font size="3"><b><i>Music:</i></b></font><br />I just finished a three-month workshop at <i>Blue Bear School of Music</i> that culminated in a fierce performance last night at the <i>Tongue and Groove Bar</i> in San Francisco. It was a lot of fun, and I'm glad I got to perform with some really good musicians, but I am so glad it's over with. I've spent the last 6 or 7 months in and out of workshops and though I enjoy them thoroughly, I am so burned out from the transportation that it requires. It's time to take a break from Blue Bear for a little while (though I'll be auditioning for another scholarship in May... so the crazy train keeps movin' along). Thank you to everyone who showed up last night and I promise to keep you all informed of future performances.<br /><br /><font size="3"><b><i>Work:</i></b></font><br />It seems that I'm finally being rewarded for my hard work at <i>Games of Berkeley</i>. I'm receiving more hours, which will seemingly (hopefully) increase further in the coming weeks. I've been given more responsibility and it seems that I'm getting more respect. It's been a long time coming... seems like forever. It definitely feels good to be appreciated and it's comforting to know that I do and will have a bit more financial stability for the immediate future... which leads me to my next topic...<br /><br /><font size="3"><b><i>Love:</i></b></font><br />I love Caitlin so much. It's been so wonderful developing our relationship and I find myself so in love with this girl, it shocks me sometimes. We'll be moving in together very soon (some time in May), and we're currently looking for apartments together. She loves me and she thinks the world of me... and she needs to realize that I think the world of her as well. She's coming along with that, but it's going to take some more time and work to really convince her. Our anniversary is this Saturday (April Fool's day, ha!)... this should give me a chance to really show her how I feel, all over again. I'm just so happy to be with her right now, and I can't wait to share a home with her. I'm so very in love...<br /><br /><br />...I really should post more often, but I'm a lazy bastard. Everyone, feel free to remind me to keep posting, I need a nice swift kick in the memory banks every now and then. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:berkeleyover:533 2006-02-11T12:21:57Z 2006-02-11T12:21:57Z Nine Inch Nails - "Into the Void" Yesterday, I held my lover tight as she poured a stream of tears down her face. "Your are my strength" she tells me... and yet I could not save her from the source of her tears... from him. Wether he's vulture, vermin, or a fire-breathing dragon who cares not for anything that does not benefit him, I hate him... all over again. So, wise Dragon, you believe that I am ruining this wonderful young woman's life? Well then, drink in her tears, peel back your vile scales, take a long hard look into the mirror... and ponder the suffering that you have stabbed into her heart... and finally, realize that you are currently the only person in her life that is ruining any part of her.